Last Match Of 2009?

On perhaps the last match of the year, K,LT,S, and Mike traveled to Chickasaw GC on an exceptionally nice December day. While these four were enjoying a relaxing day at the links, Ron was protecting the free word from the evil duck. Thanks to Ron and men like him we can all sleep a little better at night knowing that there are a few less ducks out there. LT believing that the great comeback that team K/M made at The Tennessean earlier this year was a fluke, took on Sam as his partner for the second time. Although Sam has proved himself as a formidable opponent in matches against Mike, in his only match of the year competing against Karl, he was obviously unable to withstand the pressure and faultered on the back nine at The Tennessean allowing team K/M to win. The foursome was 7 over on hole #1, thanks to LT and K's triples. When Karl hit a 14 footer for birdie on the true putting greens on #4 team K/m went up 2. They were up 5 at the turn. K got his second birdie on #12, and when Mike birdied #13(after Karl made the find of the year on M's second shot), their team was up 9 and cruised on to victory. The loss left Sam without a victory in team play this year and it may be a while before we see team LT/S in action again. In the only head to head match of the day, K was able to build a 5 stroke lead after 12 and went on to win. It is doubtful that there will be another opportunity for any more play this year and the 2009 season perhaps has come to an end. In the very near future we will hope to publish all the stats for the year and of course voting for The Provisional Mulligan Cup winner will be voted on by all five of TFF at the end of the year. TFF would like to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and better golfing in 2010!!
Scores/Birdies
M-39/41-80-1
S-42/40-82-0
K-45/44-89-2
LT-48/47-95-0

Karl Considers Trade To The Saturday Fivesome

For the first time this year, TFF played on Saturday(Nov. 28th) and it was a great day for Karl who won 3 lunches. All 5 made the trip to Falcon Ridge. Team K/M giving 14 points, were down 1 after 2, but when they went up 1 after 4 they would never trail again. They were up 7 at the turn and closed the match out on #15. Mike's birdie on #3 allowed him to be even after 9 and up 1 on Sam who birdied #5. Mike doubled both 10 and 12, but was able to birdie 14. Sam was unable to make much of a charge but was able to pick up 1 and had to settle for another tie with Mike. Ron got off to a bad start but was the low man on the back with a 40 and was able to beat Mike(M gave R 10). LT started ok but had a bad back(actually it's a bad shoulder). Karl had a chance for a good score until his only double of the day on 13 was followed by a triple. However, Karl was all smiles as he won 3 meals and is undefeated this year in Saturday play.
Scores-Birdies:
M-36/43-79-2
S-37/42-79-1
K-41/44-85-0
R-46/40-86-0
LT-41/49-90-0
Notes of Interest:
K/M will give 15
M will give R 9 and they are even on lunches
R will give K 1 and R owes 1 lunch
K will give LT 2 and LT owes K 1 lunch

Darby Has His Day, Leads Team To Victory

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, Mike and Karl have agreed to drop their lawsuit against TFF. In an out of court settlement, TFF promised to never again support, back, and or promote the celebration of Darby Day. Also, TFF agreed to pay for counseling for both Mike and Karl who are both suffering from Post Darby Day Syndrome. Now that the lawsuit is over, TFF can report on perhaps the most eventful match of the year. Darby Day began with a catered meal from Chic Fillet as well as a sack of treats for Ron. The fivesome drove to Ross Creek in what would become another beautiful day. Ron began the celebration of his day by holing out a sand shot for birdie on #1 and 3 holes later birdied #4 to give his team a 3 point lead. Two holes later, LT birdied #6(#5 handicap) putting LT/R up 4 and they would finish out the front nine with a 3 point lead. M/K however, felt pretty confident as in recent history, team LT/R have faltered on the back nine. At the turn, Sam was up 1 in his weekly battle with Mike. Mike gave Ron 10 strokes so Ron was up 9 strokes after posting a 42. Ron gave Karl 1 stroke so he was up 5. Karl gave LT 2 and LT was still up 2 despite posting a 48. Sam began the back with a beautiful approach shot on #10 and nailed his putt for a rare if ever seen birdie on this most challenging hole. Mike doubled putting Sam up 4. TFF recorded 5 bogies on #11 which put LT/R up 5points with 7 to go. Mike and Karl both parred #12 to pick up a much needed 2 points. When Mike recorded the only par on #13, he not only led his team to within 1, but also got back to within 2 of Sam. However, Sam nailed a 51.5 foot birdie putt on the par 3 #14 to increase his lead back to 4. With only a 1 point lead going into #15, LT inspired his team as he nailed a 19 footer for birdie and a 3 point lead. He followed that up with a par on #16 and put his team up 4 and dormie with 2 holes to play. In individual matches at this point: S up 3 on M, R is up 4 on M and 3 on K, LT is up 3 on K. Despite the odds, team K/M were able to capitalize on a triple by LT and a quadruple by R to get back to 2. Everyone hit a good drive on the long and dangerous #18 except for K who hit a classic elephant's butt drive (high and stinky). Still in possession of his mulligan and after a long consultation with his partner, K hit another drive and improved it by 100 yards. Things looked good for K/M when R shanked his third shot. Ron's 4th shot was executed well but still 12 feet away. LT posted a 6 which gave him a 1 stroke victory over K. K and M both made easy bogies, with both just missing long par attempts. As Ron lined up his 12 foot bogie, he had to make it for not only a team win but also a win over K and a tie with M. Has ever such pressure rested on any man's shoulders? Ron nailed the putt and with tears in his eyes, he thanked all for honoring him with Darby Day. " It was the best day of my life! the only way it could have been any better was that if my partner LT hadn't eaten all my cookies."

Scores/birdies
S-40/39-79-2
M-41/41-82-0
R-42/50-92-2
K-48/46-94-0
LT-48/47-95-2

Notes of Interest
Team K/M will give 14
M will give R 10
R will give K 2
K will give LT 1
everyone is even on lunches
there is a rumor of a possible match this Friday! Happy Thanksgiving!

Darby Day Ends In Lawsuit

Late Friday night, TFF was contacted by lawyers representing the ACLU that there will be legal action over what they referred to as:" The forced celebration of Darby Day." Apparently, TFF members Karl and Mike are suing TFF claiming that their constitutional rights were broken when they were forced to celebrate a holiday that was against their personal beliefs. Also, they claim that their First Amendment rights of freedom of speech were violated. The ACLU is bringing in their top gun attorneys in what is sure to be a landmark case that could set a precedence for similar lawsuits. Both Mike and Karl were obviously shaken as they released a joint statement to the press:"We both firmly believe that every person has the right to celebrate whatever holiday they choose in whatever way they deem best for them. However, it is not the right, nor even the privilege, of TFF to expose and or force their members to celebrate a holiday that goes against their core beliefs.Over 200 years ago, the United States government was established to create freedom for all citizens to believe, worship, and celebrate according to their individual convictions, and to protect citizens from being proselytised and forced to celebrate without their consent. We believe TFF was created for the purpose of individual enjoyment and not for the members to be exposed to forced glorification of another member. Mike and I both regret that we allowed ourselves to participate in Darby Day to the extent that we did and apologize to our fans. We both pledge that henceforth we will make every effort to avoid being nice to Darby." Due to the pending lawsuit, TFF has announced that all scores(especially birdies) and all matches both team and individual will be declared null and void until a settlement is reached.

Remember,Friday Is The First Annual Be Nice To Darby Day

Absolutely perfect! What else could you say? Sam, Mike, Ron, and Karl traveled to The Farms this past Friday on perhaps the most beautiful day of the year. LT had flown down to Destin in his private jet to collect his standard appearance fee to play with a few amateurs. LT makes such appearances occasionally throughout the year for an undisclosed amount. However, TFF has learned that The Australian Masters had to settle for Tiger Woods( 3 million appearance fee)because they couldn't"t afford LT. Meanwhile, back on The Farms, everything was going Karl's way, as he was up 4 on Ron(K got 2 strokes) as the foursome approached the 8th tee box. #8 was the site of one of the most controversial holes of the year. It was on #8 back in July that the now infamous "That's Good rule Of 09" was put into TFF's rulebook. In case you don't remember,Karl was slightly struggling on this hole as he was putting for an 11( 3 lost balls,1 out of bounds). It was at this time that Ron said, "that's good". However, Karl didn't hear him, missed the short putt and recorded a 12 on the hole. it wasn't until the ride home that it was discovered by Mike that Karl actually had scored 1 shot better than everyone thought. The new score allowed K to tie R. Well, ever since then, Ron has argued that the ruling by TFF was not only wrong but un-biblical. Ron's point is that God's grace is for all men, but in order to receive His grace a man must accept it. In other words, God doesn't force his grace on anyone. It's a free gift, but it must be accepted. Unfortunately for the man that never accepts God's grace, once he dies, it's too late and he is doomed to an eternity in Hell. Ron's point is that when a round of golf is over, the scores are totaled and you either win or lose. Either way, it's over and there is nothing you can do.(just like when your life is over) Ron goes on to claim that Karl never accepted the "that's good" until it was too late.(again,similar to the man who dies without accepting God's grace, it's too late) Well, perhaps this theological discussion has soom merit and an application to golf. As a result of Ron's protest, TFF Rules Committee(composed of Karl), will reopen the case and further consider this unique case. However, any change in the ruling will go into effect for the 2010 season and all matches this year will continue to play under the "That's Good Ruling of 09." Well, back to #8 where Karl improved his score by 7 strokes and birdied the hole. Mike missed perhaps the best chance for TFF's first eagle of the year by leaving his 18 foot putt short. Sam also birdied #8. At the turn,M-37,S-39, K-42,R-47. However, when Ron birdied #12 he cut Karl's lead to just 3 strokes. The 17th hole proved crucial to Karl when he parred and Ron doubled to go up 4 with one to go. Karl approached the 18th with a conservative 5 wood off the tee into the water. With strokes still to spare he preceded to hit his third shot into the water also. Now the match was on as Ron hit a perfect lay up. No longer Mr. Conservative, Karl grabbed his 3 wood. He needed to carry 200 yards and did ending up 10 yards over the green. Ron's 3rd shot was about 19 feet from the hole with a very good look at a birdie.Karl's sixth shot was a thing of beauty, as it lipped the cup(nothing ever drops for Karl) and wound up about 6 feet away. When Ron's birdie attempt just missed, Karl lagged up to within the leather, took his 8 and a perfect 1 stroke victory over Ron.
Tomorrow, TFF will be celebrating the first annual "Be Nice To Darby Day". It is expected that all members of TFF will go out of their way to be considerate of Ron's needs and be courteous to him at all times.
Scores-birdies
M-37/38-75-1
S-39/41-80-2
R-47/41-88-1
K-42/47-89-1
Notes of Interest
Team K/M will give 15
Mike will give Ron 10 and they are even
Ron will give Karl 1 and owes K 2
K will give LT 2 and LT owes K 1

Shankapotamus Leads Team To Victory

On the first Friday in November, the sun returned from it's 2 month hiatus for a beautiful day. S, LT, K, And M travelled to the challenging by design and extraordinary by nature; The Tennessean. Due to Ron's absence, LT teamed up with the usually Lone Ranger Sam. As usual, K was stuck with Mike. Also, the 4 were joined by M's friend Rusty, who made his 2nd appearance with TFF. After some confusion about the rules of golf, such as after you play hole #1 you move on to hole #2 and not return to play hole #1 over if you don't like what you made the first time, the match was on. After 3 holes, the match was all square. However, on hole #4, Mike made the strategic move of the year. Unbeknownst to even his partner, Mike pretended to become Shankapotamus. In the Urban Dictionary, Shankapotamus is defined as: "Someone who has the "shanks" so bad and is all over the golf course, usually making everyone around him uncomfortable." Believe me, Shankapotamus had us all very uncomfortable as he posted a 9 on #4. Shankapotamus went on to record 2 double bogies and post a season high 46 on the front. Team LT/S were 9 up at the turn and confident of a free lunch. Shankapotamus had other plans as he responded with a 37. Sam who with the aid of 2 birdies on the front, was even as he teed it up on #10. The pressure of a rejuvenated Shankapotamus, however, was too much for Sam as he doubled 4 of the first 5 on the back to go on to score his worst 9 of the year with a 45. After 8 holes, team K/M were only 1 point down and needed both low ball and total score for a victory. K who was playing "steady", was 2 up on LT going into 17. K hit a perfect drive, but did a Shankapotamus impersonation himself and made a triple. LT and K were tied going into #18(with K giving LT 1 stroke). K, still a little angry over his 7 on #17, hit his drive into the woods. LT only needed a drive in the fairway for a sure victory, but followed K into the woods. K got a 6, LT a 7 and Shankapotamus sunk his birdie putt for the team victory. Tomorrow, TFF(minus LT) will travel to The Farms for the first Friday the 13th match of the year.
S-36!/45!-81-2birdies
Shankapotamus-46!/37!-83-2
K-43/45-88-0
LT-45/45-90-0
Notes Of Interest:
Next team match-K/M will give 15
M and R- R gets 9 and M owes 1 to Ron
K and R- K gets 2 and R owes K
K will give LT 2 and LT owes K 1

The Friday Fivesome Survive Category 5 Hurricane

On the last Friday in October, and in the heart of the monsoon season, TFF teed it up at Jackson National. Fortunately, the eye of the hurricane was passing over as they played the front nine. All 5 were present for the match that was sure to be rained out. After 9: Sam had a 37 with 2 birdies and a three stroke lead over his nemesis Mike. K-43,LT-46, and Ron who had a tough 9 on #3 had a 47. Team K/M had a 3 point lead. As TFF made the turn, the weather made a turn for the worse as on and off heavy rains(mostly on) sat in for the duration. If it were not for the constant encouragement by Ron to continue play, the other 4 would have called it quits. Ron went on to lead his team to victory, as he hit a tough 4 foot downhiller on 18 for a 1 point victory. Due to everyone being drenched, TFF was unable to dine. At last word, LT's car should be dried out by Thanksgiving.
S-37/44-2birdies
M-40/44-84-0
K-43/44-87-2
LT-46/42-88-1
R-47/46-93-0