First Month Of Play Comes To An End

January play ended this past Friday at Jackson National on a sunny, pleasant day. However, the weather this month has been harsh and has limited TFF to only 2 matches. Ron, who thinks his play in the first match of the year was good enough for Player Of The Year, skipped out on the fivesome to go duck hunting. This left his partner LT in somewhat of a dilemma. Would LT pick up Sam* as a substitute partner? Two time Player Of The Year, Sam*, although a dominate force as an individual player, has the worst record in team match play of all the fivesome. However, LT was confident in not only his play, but in the lack of game of team Karl/Mike and agreed to the match. Sam* proved his worth on the first hole as his birdie gave the team a 2 point lead. Mike answered with a birdie of his on on #2 and squared the match. Karl's par on #3 was good for 2 points and when his 2nd shot on #6 stoped 3 inches from eagle, team K/M went up 7 and cruised on to victory. Karl was zoned in on the pins for most of the day, which explains his 8 one putts. After the match a frustrated LT talked to the press. "I don't understand it! Between Sam* and I we own The Provisional Mulligan Cup, but whenever he plays with me we lose. Next time I consider Sam* as my partner remind me that it would be easier to just tell Karl that I owe him another lunch." TFF wishes Sam* a safe and successful trip to Panama. The forecast doesn't look good for this Friday, but at least the groundhog didn't see his shadow.

Results:
S*-41/39-80-2(birdies)
M-38/44-82-1
K-41/43-84-2
LT-44/48-92-0

Notes of interest:
LT owes K 2 and gets 2
K owes R 1 and gets 1
M owes R ? and R gets ?
Team K/M give 13

Ron (The Comeback Kid)

The first match 0f 2011 was played at Jackson National last Friday. The two stories of the day, were Ron's start and Ron's finish. Ron began the day with a 5 over 9 on the #9 handicap first hole. At this point he was on track to shoot a ninety over par 162. After one hole, Ron was 5 strokes behind Karl, had to play Mike even for the rest of the round, and was 2 down against team K/M. When his par putt rolled in on #18 he secured three victories, beating K by 3, M by 1 and a team victory(team victory actually occurred on hole 16 where Ron parred the tough par 4). Other than Ron's comeback, the day was uneventful as the wind and cold were used as excuses for the fivesomes scores. All five look forward to better playing conditions and looking for other reasons to blame their poor play on.
Scores/Birdies
Sam*-41/40-81/2
Mike-41/44-85/2
Ron-47/42-89
Karl-45/47-92
LT-44/49-93

Notes of interest:
M owes R 2 from today plus ? from last year R only gets 4
K owes R 1 and gets 1
LT and K even and LT gets 1
Team LT/R will get 14

Sam Wylie*

Happy new year!!, and welcome to the 2011 TFF season. Have you made your new year's resolutions? I'm sure it's the same as mine, to take home The Provisional Mulligan Cup! This brings us to the topic of this blog, who won the 2010 award? First, a quick review of the season. Well, all five of the fivesome can best be described by one adjective: unimpressive!! With this in mind, TFF voting committie (Karl) went to this blog spot to review the year and all the reliable statistics that this site is famous for. Unfortunately, he was startled to find that the last post was in August. What happened? TFF investigative force is currently looking into this matter. Early discoveries have been that it appears that Karl sold TFF scorecards on EBay to fund his extravagant Pacific Northwest trip. It appears that these scorecards from September to December are lost forever. As a result TFF voting committee (Karl) has made his decision. The 2010 Provisional Cup Winner is Sam Wylie*!! Congratulations to Sam, but you may have noticed the * behind Wylie. What's the * for? The symbol * is an Asterisk. An asterisk is a typographical symbol whose origin is from the Greek word "asteriskos" which means "little star". The asterisk is used to call out a footnote. In sports, an asterisk is used to indicate that a record is somehow tainted by circumstances, which are putatively explained in a footnote supposedly referenced by the asterisk. This usage arose after the 1961 baseball season in which Roger Maris broke Babe Ruth's 34-year-old single season home run record. Because Ruth had amassed 60 home runs in a season with only 154 games, compared to Maris's 61 over 162 games, baseball commissioner Ford Frick announced that Maris' accomplishment would be recorded with an asterisk. The NFL, NBA, and NHL have all had increases in the amount of games they play each season, yet no player in any of these leagues has ever had an asterisk put next to his name for breaking a record of some past great star. Hank Aaron did not have an asterisk put next to his name when he broke Ruth's career home run record despite having some 3000 more at-bats. So, what is the footnote that the * behind Wylie calls out? The footnote read's: "Due to the lack of impressive play by any of The Friday Fivesome in the 2010 season, the trophy will remain with Sam. Thus Sam's record of consecutive awards will remain tainted throughout eternity." Well, there you have it, the answer to what will surly become a frequently asked trivia question, "Name the only two players with asterisks behind their records?" Wylie and Maris. Hopefully for both Sam and Roger, perhaps the steroid era will be loaded with asterisks behind such names as Barry Bonds etc. and Sam's name will be lost in the crowd. Well, there you have it. Good luck to all members of TFF as the 2011 season hopefully begins this Friday.

Karl Seeks Sympathy Strokes

It is rumored that all 5 will be teeing it up at Jackson National this Friday after a long hiatus from play. Karl (The Krapper with a K) would like to thank the other four for their prayers during his current bout with what appears to be a 24 hour stomach virus that is at this time in it's 441st hour(8/26 at 6pm). As much as Karl was touched by the fasting and praying, he would like to suggest that strokes would also be accepted. The following scores are from the last two official rounds that were both played at Jackson National. Unofficially, it has been reported that Danny Walker led team Danny/Sam to a thrashing of team M/R last week at Humboldt.



S-39/43-82-1(birdie)

M-41/42-83-0

R-44/43-87-1

K-44/51-95-0





The Next Week

S-38/39-77-3

R-41/41-82-0

K-43/47-90-0



Notes Of Interest:
M and R even and R gets 7
K and R even and K gets 3
LT owes K 1 and LT gets 3
Team LT/R get 18

2010 Stats To Date

Jackson National Results:

S-36/40-76-3

M36/42-78-1

R-40/39-79-1

K-47/41-88-1



Notes Of Interest:

R and M are even and M gives 8

K and R are even and R gives 1

LT owes K 1 and gets 3

Team K/M give 18



2010 Stats to Date:



Rounds Played:

1.M-16

2.S-15, K-15

3.R-13

4.LT-10



Scoring Average-(2009 average)
1.M-79.2-(79.2) -0
2.S-79.4-(78.53) +.87
3.R-86.4-(87.65) -1.25!!
4.LT-88.4-(89.65)-1.25!!
5.K-88.9-(88.8) +.1(115 at Falcon Ridge didn't help)

Birdies(per round)
1.M-17(1.06)
2.S-13(.87)
3.R-8(.62)
4.K-6(.4)
5.LT-2(.2)

Team Records
1.K/M vs. LT/R-5-3 (not as dominate as thought)
2K/M vs. LT/S-1-0
3.K/M vs. R/S-1-0

Individual Records:
M vs. S-7-6-2
M vs. R-12-0
M vs. K-13-1
M vs. LT-7-1
S vs. R-13-0
S vs. K -13-1
S vs. LT-7-0
R vs.K-6-6
R vs. LT-5-2-1
K vs. LT-5-3

Please Review These Stats And Let Me Know of Any Corrections. Only 5 Months For 2010 Season. Good Luck To All In Their Quest For The Cup!!

Team LT/Ron Have Big Win At Chickasaw, Overheat At The Farms

Three weeks ago Ron took the short cut to Chickasaw. Although he saved 6 minutes and was able to get Karl car sick, the time saved was quickly lost with slow play. In fact, Karl was forced to withdraw after 15 holes. "When I started playing this game I promised Martha that I'd limit my time on the course to no more than 9 hours a day. Recently Mike and I played 54 with plenty of time to spare but today I had to leave the other 4 players in order to keep from going over the 9 hours." Team LT/R had revenge on their minds and dominated their opponents from the first hole, closing out the match on #13. At the turn: S-37, R-38, LT-39, M-39, and K thanks to being 7 over on the 2 par 5's:48. LT carded another 39 on the back to beat Mike straight up with a 78! Sam matched his 37 on the back for a 74.

Scores/birdies:

S-37/37-74-1

LT-39/39-78-1

M-39/43-82-1

R-38/46-84-0

K-48/48-96-0



This past week the 5 traveled to Dyersburg to play the always well conditioned Farms. All 5 played the front close with a low of 37 by Mike and a high of 41 by LT and Ron. Team K/M were able to overcome their recent defeat at Chickasaw and get back to their winning ways. LT, however was not only overcome by K/M, but also by the heat as he was unable to play the last hole. Although team K/M will surely remain hot, hopefully the weather will cool down some before next Friday.
Scores/Birdies:
M-37/39-76-1
S-38/40-78-2
K-40/40-80-1
R-41/45-86-0
LT-41/47-88-1

Notes of interest:
M will give R 9 and R owes M 1
K and R will play even and R owes 1
LT will get 3 from K and owes K 1
Team LT/R will get 18

Missionaries Fall To "The Machine"

As Karl(with a K) strolled off #18, it started with a gentle murmur that crescendoed into a deafening roar: "M-V-P!!, M-V-P!!" The fan favorite at Falcon Ridge had this to say:"The fans love me here, until recently this course has treated the average blue collar fan well. Then they enclosed the pavilion behind #18 allowing only the elite to enter. It's been a personal agenda of mine to break down these windows and open the pavilion to everyone." Why would the fans be chanting MVP to a player who recently recorded a 115 on this very course? Well, we'll discuss that later, first let's recap the last couple of TFF matches.

Several weeks ago newly reinstated member to The Jackson Country Club, Mike, invited TFF to play there. The course was in pristine condition and well worth the $584 per round average Mike will pay to play there this year. All five of TFF made a rare appearance for the match. Karl got off to a slow start and was 8 over after 5 holes allowing team LT/R to take an early lead, however, "The Machine" as team K/M have become known as, began to click and were up 2 at the turn. They cruised on to victory closing out the match on #16. Mike and Sam battled to a tie at 80 while the "little 3" played close with Karl edging out LT and Ron with a long 28 foot par putt on #18 for an 86 to their 87's.

Scores/Birdies

M-40/40-80-1

S-41/39-80-1

K-46/40-86-1

LT-43/44-87-0

R-44/43-87-1(Ron had 8 5's on the front)



The following week M,LT,and R went to Jackson National, where team LT/R agreed to play team K/M giving K an 86 in his absence. Despite Mike's impressive 74(4 boggies and 2 birdies), it was the consistent play of Karl that once again carried "The Machine" to another victory. LT couldn't get his game going but when Ron holed his sand shot on #13 for his second birdie of the day, he was only 3 down to Mike and in great shape for a victory. However, a 4 putt Shotsky on #16 did Ron in and Mike went on to victory.

M-37/37-74-2

R-41/46-87-2

LT-45/46-91-0



Then last week fresh from their trip to Panama, Ron talked Sam into partnering up with him in place of LT and "The Missionaries" took on "The Machine". LT was absent once again, this time due to an alleged injury to his good shoulder ( it was really his bad shoulder until he hurt his good shoulder which made his bad shoulder his good shoulder, or something like that). There has been some speculation that perhaps LT has been practicing self-injury similar to many soldiers over the years who have injured themselves on purpose to avoid going to war. "The Missionaries" came out playing "inspired" golf and when Sam followed Ron's birdie on #3 with a birdie on #4, they went up 6 after only 4 holes. Once again. "The Machine" began to roll and picked up a point a hole on 5-9 to only be down 1 at the turn. Of note, it was the first time ever that all players broke 40. Although the match remained close, Karl's string of 11 straight pars on holes 2-12 helped carry "The Machine" to victory and with Ron's Shortsky on #16 "The Missionaries" didn't have a prayer. "The Machine" has become such a dominate team that there has been some discussion of a rule's change. Although no one has ever dared to consider changing "LT Rules" golf, "The Machine" may force the rule's committee, (Karl), to consider LT and Ron's plea for help. In the past, there have been players that were so dominate in their sport that rules were changed. Take basketball for example. When George Miken began to dominate the area around the basket to such a degree, the NBA widened the free throw lane and initiated the 3 second rule. When Wilt Chamberlain was in high school, and was shooting a free throw, he would stand at the top of the key, throw the ball up toward the basket, take 2 steps, jump toward the rim and dunk the ball. Basketball was forced to change the rules to state that a player cannot cross the plane of the free-throw line when shooting a free-throw. Then of course there was the "Alcindor Rule" which forbid dunking in college games. After Lew graduated the rule was rescinded and the dunk was once again allowed. Has "The Machine" reached the point of dominance that rules must be changed? In the next match, team K/M must give 18, if they win what happens next? Do they give 2 strokes on the #1 handicap? TFF rules committee has decided at this time to continue the usual adjustable wager, but will be open to discussion if the points go beyond 18. After the match, when Karl was asked about his 37 stroke improvement from his last round at Falcon Ridge(over 2 strokes a hole improvement), he had this to say: "All you can ask for in golf is consistency and as long as I'm in the 78-115 range, I'll be happy." After the match, the four dined at the newly opened Coyote Blues where Sam was forced to buy Karl's lunch.

M-37/38-75

S-38/38-76-1

K-37/41-78

R-37/47-84-1